Romano's therapy diary
by nekojuliet
Summary: Italy and Spain came up with a new "therapy" for Romano, writing in a diary. OC is mentioned, and Rated T due to his swearing self.
1. Therapy Diary page 1

Dear Diary, journal thing...

The names Romano, the only reason I'm writing this, is because, that Tomato bastard and my brother wouldn't leave me alone unless I did this for "therapy". Stupid bastards... They aren't even going to read this whole thing, or not at all... Now, I'm not that potato bastards brother, Prussia who writes in a damn diary every day like a little girl! Not that this one principessa is one to do that either.

Her name is Transylvania, now she's been friends with both potato bastards for years now. Her damn brother is so over protective of her it's not funny! He almost shot that scone bastard for making a move on her! It drives me nuts because I really do like her... Blood loving bastard, not that his sister is one! I mean she is a vampire but she is so much like a principessa, that little flaw can be over looked. I mean when that blood loving bastard's beautiful sister isn't around he's an okay guy but once she's in the conversation he's ready to blow your brains out.

I hope he doesn't find this or I'm going to end up a dead nation. What's worse is if, Transylvania's other best friend Russia sees this! That creep is pretty much everywhere! He also doesn't take kindly to advances on that wonderful principessa. Makes me wonder if he likes her the same way as I do. Spain is always telling me that it's love, what a load bull! It maybe a little crush but nothing of that degree! Then again, half the things Spain says is bull! I'm now questioning if this is just a way for him to know all of my secrets. Though, my little brother wouldn't do that to me, would he? He isn't all that bright to plan something like this.

Now I really hope they don't read this but I do care for those two that's how I know what Spain is saying about love is stupid. I mean, I care for the Principessa but I can't damn right swear in front of her! I know it's a little crush and I'll get over it soon... I hope... Oh great my phone is ringing in the middle of the night... it better not be that idiot of a brother... though, venting out like this is quite nice... maybe I'll continue writing in this stupid diary, journal, thing... just not every stupid day like that beer bastard Prussia.


	2. Page two

Dear stupid journal diary thing...

I don't get why after two weeks I even came back to writing in this thing... I guess I should just re-cap what the crap happened between that time and today; Spain was being a tomato bastard as always, My brother was being an idiot like always, I tried to kill those two potato bastards one day and that pedophile France messed it up, Russia was being a creepy bastard like he always is, Scone bastard is trying to hit on the principessa and her not even knowing, American bastard was being a pig and threw a party today. So I'm writing in this after the party.

The party itself was not half bad. It got those idiots off my back for a while. Pretty much everyone was drunk, though I managed to stay sober. Romania and Transylvania were sober though it's not surprising. Romania made sure no one got near his sister without his permission. Though she looked bored. I wished Romania trusted me as much as he did those two potato bastards. Maybe then I would try to get closer to her. I'm pretty sure with her beautiful face and wonderful personality Germany, of all people will get her. I know I stand no chance, Romania would blow my head off if I tried.

Though I got my chance when a drunk American bastard made all of us play seven minutes in heaven. Sadly lady luck isn't on my side today she let her in with that potato bastard's brother. To make it worse we caught them french kissing, Prussia topless. It's obvious she wasn't going to stop him. Romania did shoot Prussia for nearly fucking her, at least I enjoyed that part. I left early anyways, I didn't want to see her with an ass hole like him.

When I got home I watched some show Italy wanted me to watch, it was about some girl that hunted devils and I should say it should be rated M and it's a damn cartoon probably one Japan gave my brother! I mean the main girl and one guy were about to do _it._ I stopped the video right there because of my mind set at the moment. Stupid Prussia! He's a damn bastard! After I give this back to Japan he is going to get a shit storm coming right at him!

Now I'm in my room and that tomato bastard is telling me to not be depressed behind that locked door. I'm NOT FUCKING DEPRESSED! I'm just pissed off! That tomato bastard isn't helping with calming me down! All I want to know is why she would choose a potato bastard over me! I'll find out tomorrow until then Spain and anyone who makes this mood worse is guaranteed to have the italian mafia after them!


	3. Page 3

Dear stupid journal diary thing...

Italy made me write in this stupid thing today after threatening to kill him. Spain is already running, I pelted Japan with my tomatoes for that show thing that he gave Italy, I sent the mafia after those potato bastards for two reasons, one Prussia was about to fuck the principessa, I don't care if he was drunk off his ass, and second of all I just plain hate them like his brother. My own brother was an idiot and made me take this and now we're here at that blood loving bastards place. Romania apperently was planning to shoot Prussia again and thanked me for doing the job for him. Now, if only my mafia would listen to me and actually kill that bastard.

That scone bastard was already here, mind you that he's on the floor face down. while the principessa was not in a happy mood to say the least. I'll show you how this conversation went.

"What do you want Romano?"

"I wanted to see you."

"Good for you, look I'm going to Prussia's place." I gave her a hug trying to make her stay. I knew she liked Prussia but that bastard doesn't deserve her! "Let go of me you bastard!"

"Not until you know that Prussia doesn't deserve you!" She turned around to look at me.

"You know England said that to me."

"Then it's fucking true!"

"Says who?" Okay now she was pissing me off. I kissed her before leaving her alone. Though I did tell her one thing before I left.

"Says the Italian who loves you more than that potato bastard ever will." I guess Spain wasn't bull shitting me when he said I loved her. I went back to the tomato bastard's place. All that I can now think about was how Spain is going to rub it in my face once he hears about it.

I'm back in my room now. I was fucking right! Spain was rubbing that kiss in my face behind that door! He heard the whole story from France who heard from that scone bastard, who got from that blood loving bastard! The principessa must have told him due to the fact she wasn't happy in the first place. I don't think I should come out of my room for at least ten days. Until then I'm going to be snacking on tomatoes and hoping Vampire bastard doesn't break down my door.


	4. Page 4

Dear stupid journal diary thing...

I'm still alive. I think that blood loving bastard has calmed down. I was walking on my own and I saw the principessa. She was talking to herself with pancakes on her lap. I think she got her insanity from that older brother of hers. She kept referring to herself as Canada. It looked like she had to keep herself occupied while she was waiting- probably for that Prussian bastard! It looked like a picnic for the two of them. Oh shit she saw me! I'll finish this thing off later.

The two potato bastards showed up with that hamburger bastard, scone bastard, creepy ass France, scary ass Russia, Japan's whole dang family, and my brother. No one knew why she had thrown a party except Prussia, America, and Japan's family. Apparently it was that hamburger bastard's brother's and that stoic Asian's birthday- his name was Hong Kong, I think... Isn't that freaking interesting.

* * *

Well since I, Transylvania, am the only one not drunk- it's bad for the blood you know... Let me say that I find it quite amusing that you have a diary, Romano. I'll tell you what really happened at Hong Kong and Canada's birthday party, since you passed out and this fell out of your pocket. I swear I only saw this page!

I set this whole party up for Canada as a surprise- you know America's brother. Magic helped me speed up the set up process. Canada came early so I had to make do without the huge surprise part. We talked over pancakes and I saw you. I was quite sure I left you a message on your cell phone about this party. From reading what you saw, you never checked your phone. HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE CANADA? HE WAS RIGHT BESIDE ME! At least Hong Kong was surprised.

The Great Eight and the Asian countries showed up afterwards. Only Prussia and America could see Canada. Even then I had to remind his brother that it was Canada's birthday today! Even worse, I had to remind everyone else that Canada was there every couple minutes! America gave Canada a shot, and then you know what happened: everyone except me and Hong Kong got drunk and passed out while watching the fireworks. You know you all are freaking heavy! It's even worse when you live half way across from where Canada lives! You're lucky that magic can solve pretty much everything. By the way, you remember my pet bat Alucard? Yeah, he says that either you stop calling me 'princess' or get bitten. Until I accept you as a lover. With plenty of hugs, Transylvania.

* * *

Oh shit! What the fuck? I woke up and opened this, for some damn reason, to find that she wrote in this. Wait- does this mean that she loves me, or what? I don't know! I'll ask my last damn resort to things like this tomorrow. Until that happens I'm going back to sleep.


End file.
